If you have a prostate or have a partner who has one, you've probably wondered what all the buzz is about hitting the P-spot (the male equivalent of the female G-spot). Prostate stimulation is one way to expand your pleasure possibilities, and it can have some incredible health benefits too! Whether you're looking to experience deeper orgasms or to release toxins from your body, milking your prostate is something to consider in your solo or partnered anal play.
WHERE IS THE PROSTATE LOCATED?
The prostate rests below the bladder and next to the rectum, and you can feel it through the rectum's front wall.
To find the P-spot, insert an anal toy or finger about 2-4 inches (5-10 cm) and angle it towards your belly button. When aroused, your prostate will fill up with prostatic fluid and become easier to find. It'll also become more sensitive to touch, but more on that in a second!
WHY DOES PROSTATE STIMULATION FEEL GOOD?
Prostate play and anal play can add new elements to your sex life. The great thing about prostate play is that regardless of your sexuality, you can still enjoy it if you are a penis owner.
However, a lot of men are hesitant about receiving anal pleasure. And some even wonder if it makes them gay. Enjoying prostate stimulation has nothing to do with your sexual preference or identity; it merely means that you're open-minded and explorative enough to feel a different type of orgasm.
WHAT DOES A PROSTATE ORGASM FEEL LIKE?
Many people who've experienced prostate orgasms describe it as being similar to when they're about to have an orgasm from the genitals.
Others describe it as a more intense or full-bodied orgasm that's comparable to how vulva owners describe their G-spot orgasms. Like G-spot orgasms, a P-spot orgasm can offer an emotional and deeper sense of release, and orgasmic responses and muscle contractions that resonate further in the body.
But keep in mind, no two orgasms are alike and don't get too caught up in anticipating the sensations in advance! P-spot and G-spot play require practice before you see the fireworks. When you do, you'll discover that it is worth the effort.
BEFORE YOU GET STARTED
Before you jump into the deep end, here's a checklist of things you need to consider:
1) Hygiene — Master how to prep for anal play like a pro.
2) Lube — Learn how to choose the best anal lube play.
3) Consent — Not sure how to introduce your partner to anal?
TRY AN EXTERNAL MASSAGE OR RIMMING FIRST
Trying butt stuff for the first time can feel scary or uncomfortable if you're not in the right mindset, especially if you're working through all those silly taboos about having a penis and enjoying booty penetration.
Thankfully, you can enjoy prostate stimulation without having to go all the way up. There are thousands of ultra-sensitive nerve endings around the entry of your butt, both inside and out, which makes stuff like rimming or massaging that region feel amazing. Bonus: sweeten the deal by combining anal with genital play and see sparks fly! It's also a fantastic way to warm up for anal penetration.
GETTING INSIDE AND HITTING THE PROSTATE
The other way to stimulate the P-spot is by getting your lubricant ready and lathering up your finger. Remember to trim your nails, keep them clean, and use some gloves if you prefer them for anal fun.
Start by inserting one finger. The prostate should feel like a ripe plum: firm, with a little give to it. If you can't find it, try adding some familiar pleasure like oral sex or an erotic massage first. Arousal makes the prostate begin to fill up and get more substantial, which makes it both easier to find and feel more pleasurable.
Once you've found the prostate gland, there are a lot of different massage moves you can try. Many of these will sound similar to G-spot massage techniques:
STROKE THE PROSTATE
Try doing a "come hither" motion with your fingertip. Use the pad of the finger, not the tip, to avoid scratching. And remember - stroke, don't poke! Keep a slow, steady rhythm, and use firm pressure. You might need to vary the tempo and pressure until you find the right combination, so start slower and lighter, and then add more. If you're using two fingers, try the "come hither" motion at the same time, or try "finger walking".
TAP THE P-SPOT
Another popular move is tapping. Start with the pressure you use when typing on a keyboard and try going faster or slower. Each time you change things up, ask him to tell you if it feels better or not. Everyone is a little different, so listen to feedback and watch how the body responds. If you have two fingers on the P-spot, you can tap them together or alternate as if you're playing the piano.
CIRCLE THE P-SPOT
You can also do big circles across the entire prostate, little circles on just one spot, or do little circles and move them around. With circles, it's easy to go too quickly, so try to keep a steady rhythm. Some people like to put on some music with a strong beat or bass line to help them keep the pace.
MIX UP YOUR PROSTATE MASSAGING TECHNIQUE
Don't forget that stillness can be incredibly pleasurable too. Keep a constant pressure without movement, or try gently pulsing the pressure while maintaining contact. Sometimes, that can be someone's favorite prostate massage move. Just as when you're giving someone a shoulder rub, it's good to do one technique for a bit and then change it up. The nerves get used to it if you stick with one thing, so keep paying attention to signals by varying what you do every so often. The one exception to that is when your partner is getting close to an orgasm. When that happens, stick with whatever is working.
PROSTATE STIMULATION 101: USE AN ANAL TOY
There are all sorts of anal toys to bring the pleasure of prostate stimulation into your solo or coupled love life.
However, it can be tough to narrow down and choose just one anal toy, especially if you're just getting started, but have your sights set on working your way up in size to a larger toy or penis. Our Anal Training Kit is the perfect solution for the dedicated anal adventurer. This kit contains three essential silicone plugs that feature graduated tapered shapes and come in three progressive sizes.
ARE THERE ANY HEALTH BENEFITS OF PROSTATE STIMULATION?
Studies have shown that regularly milking the prostate, or massaging the prostate to release prostatic fluid, can help reduce the risk of prostate cancer. Releasing prostate fluid also flushes out the gland, and relieves inflammation and pressure in the pelvic area. Increasing blood flow in the area can also increase elasticity, strengthen the pelvic floor, and help prevent erectile challenges over time.